Rain, Rain...please don't go away...and come again yet another day!

I was sitting at my office desk jamming hard on the keys of my laptop to complete a long and critical email and then as I moved my gaze away for a moment to think 'what next?', I got half distracted. Looking wistfully beyond the french glass windows of my office I was completely smitten by the beautiful sight which greeted me. The thick clouds had cast their grey blanket cover over the city and the faint pitter patter of rain drops had already started caressing the glass panes announcing the arrival of the city's first rains. The first rains always have the same effect on me, it mesmerizes my senses and then my mind takes a visual flight to a distant land in past and fond memories engulf my senses.

Rains... mean so many irrepressible emotions...gay abandonment, freedom, innocence, pure joy, romance, love, serenity, solitude, thrill, excitement and adventure....

The heavenly sweet fragrance of the first rains when it gets introduced to mother earth yet again ...is something which will linger forever in my memory. Even now it brings with it some long lost memories and the many wonderful experiences of beautiful rainy days of past which engulf me with its cool breeze.

Rains meant something very special as a small kid...a reason to hurriedly rush out from home and thrust into the soothing embrace of the first raindrops of the season just like we greet our much awaited best buddies on their arrival after a long wait.

Rains as a kid meant paper boats...boats set sail from the confines of our tiny hands into the muddy puddles and watching them go bobbing along the whirls of rain water pools. Sometimes surviving the tumult, sometimes going under and sometimes cruising along in synch with the emotions of the eagerly watching kids.
Rains meant gum boots, rains meant new school uniform and new text books being start of the new year at school. Rains meant splashing through puddles and drawing angry looks from adults. Rains meant innocence, mischief and peals of pure laughter. Rains meant raincoats and umbrellas..rains meant school grounds filled with water, rains also meant chutti from school on lucky days when it rained cats and dogs. Rains meant missing school bus and not reaching school on time.
For me, it also meant climbing on Fiat's bumpers and wiping with a pair of deft hands ..the raindrops hanging on the window panes in a single finishing stroke. Also, sometimes losing my balance in that act and falling off the car and breaking bones. Yes..and getting a fracture too!

Rains in college meant picnics, hikes and treks to nearby mountains....enveloped with a lush green carpet and beautiful waterfalls.
Rains meant bunking college and going for movies, having bhutta on the beach.
Rains meant walking along marine drive with someone special and braving the splashing waves of the Arabian sea and getting half wet and half embarrassed.

Rains meant going away on impulse drives with your gang to nearby Alibaug beach, Bushy Dam at Lonavala or Matheran and not to forget, coming back with hoarse voices from all the singing and shouting.
Rains meant bunking college (again!)for no reason and sitting in college canteen and playing antakshari with the whole zing bang, creating ruckus and bringing the college down.
Rains meant cutting chai and hot bhajjias. And if at home, then a cup of warm coffee, a romantic book snuggled with a warm blanket..with soft numbers on the cassette player or an old movie on the VCR.

Rains...Rains..rains...oh so many emotions..and memories of yore, cherished even today.
So today in spite of some days when it decides to go berserk and play havoc with our feelings, cause traffic jams and potholes in our lives...i must say rains....thank you for these wonderful memories..i love you all the same!

Rain, Rain...please don't go away...and come again yet another day!

A Landmark in my life - Part II

Life is but a series of lessons that we learn at every step. Some lessons are like jumps over small puddles and some like high jumps while some are like steeple chase and some seem like pole vault jumps. While most of them, you prefer to forget or better still they just fade away into oblivion, very few of them tend to leave an impact on you which you carry forever.

Amongst the few lessons that tend to have the stickiness factor (Thank you Malcolm Gladwell for the term) and leave a deep impact on you are the ones which shape you into a new and evolved human being.
The Landmark Forum was exactly one of those few experiences which left an indelible impression on my mind - an eye opener, break through and transformational in nature.

If you have seen the 'Before & After' commercials then this is what Part II is exactly going to be all about.
You must have observed that in most of those cheap, gimmicky Before/After weight loss type of ads, it talks about how Ria, Rupa and Reema shed their excess weight and moved from a bulky 75 kgs built to a slender frame of 55 kgs in just 3 months.
But the central character of this 'Before/After' however is not part of the Ria, Rupa and Reema ilk and is none other than yours truly. Honestly, I did lose weight but not in the real sense of the word. More importantly, I shed a lot of baggage which I was carrying with me till I ‘got’ the Forum, after which I truly felt lighter and free.

Unlike the quick fix weight loss promotions we see on TV/newspapers, which leave us with very little positive and permanent effects, this one I truly believe will be forever.

Before the Landmark, if you had met me, I was a person whose thoughts would typically read like below.
"I am absolutely perfect and I don't need to change anything about me or better still transform".
"My life is just right and I know what I am doing. There can't be a better way to lead life other than this."
"I don't think there is anything amiss or any issue with the way my life is going. It’s just fantastic."
"My family, friends and colleagues are absolutely fine and happy with the way I am so why should I do Landmark or any other transformational course. That's just something for someone who has problems in life. I have no problems at all, in fact I have friends who look up to me for advice."
In short, I was this Ms Know-it-all!!!

And after Landmark, I don't have to tell you, right? But I still will!

My tone has changed dramatically. Not to say that I didn't lead a good, happy and content life before, but my perspective about my own self has undergone a complete U turn. What I am or perceived myself to be, my relationships, my fears and apprehensions, my feelings, emotions and most of all, my language, whether in thoughts or the spoken word, has gone through a sea change and I feel like Christopher Columbus who has just explored a new far away land. In my case of course the new me!


If you have already gone through the experience of stumbling upon the unknown side of you which always existed but not known to you...you would exactly know my situation.
A Eureka moment in your life!

I must say, each person 'gets' the forum differently depending on their past experiences, age, maturity and openness to new concepts. What I have written here is my perspective with my limited understanding from the years spent on the face of the earth.


A Few Lessons Learnt at Landmark Forum worth sharing:

A) Already always listening
Background - We think of ourselves as open and objective, but in fact our approach to ourselves, our circumstances and others is often filtered and even obscured by pre-existing notions/values, by our upbringing, values and past experiences.

For example:
You are in a conversation with a friend or spouse or colleague, exchanging thoughts and words and emotions very animatedly and discussing very openly. (or so you think)
You are having this great dialogue/conversation which is flowing very well between the two of you. But how many times during the conversation have you really, really been listening to what the opposite person is actually saying or trying to say.
Most of the times, aren't we just waiting for the opposite person to stop speaking so you can start giving your views, opinions and thoughts about the subject of conversation. We have already formed this view/opinion about the world based on our past experiences and we think that's the best view of things. And these thoughts cloud our mind so much so, that we are not even listening to the views of the opposite person. Moreover, we don't want to wait for other person to stop talking,we just want to hog the conversation thinking that what we have is the best and the other person has to accept it that way.
That's 'Already always listening' to the thoughts in our mind which is based on our past experiences and not to what the opposite person has to say.

B) Hidden Power of Context
Background -All behavior, all ways of being and acting are correlated to the context(s) from which we live our lives.

For example (The Good Samaritan experiment from the book 'The Tipping point'):
To establish the 'Power of Context' experiment, there were 2 groups formed of students studying theology (study of religion). Both groups were asked to prepare a short, extemporaneous talk on any biblical theme, then walk over to a nearby building and present it. Along the way to the presentation, each student ran into a man slumped in an alley, head down, eyes closed, coughing and groaning. The question was who would stop and help?


To make the experiment more interesting there were some variables introduced.
a) Before the experiment started the students were given a questionnaire as to why they had chosen theology. Did they see religion as a means of personal or spiritual fulfillment.
b) Others were given the parable of Good Samaritan (The popular story of how a traveler who was beaten and robbed and left for dead by the side of the road was overlooked by 2 priests while they were passing by but helped by a man- a Samaritan, member of a despised minority who not only helped him heal his wounds but provided shelter)
c)Some students while they were being sent to the other building were told ' Oh you are late, they were expecting you a few minutes ago." (Basically a hint to make them aware that they are already running late)
While some students were told, 'It will be a few minutes before they are ready for you, you have time but you might as well head now."(A hint to make them know that they have some time at hand)

The experiment was to understand which group of people would stop by and help the destitute lying on the road.
It was interesting to note that the group which was told that they had very little time, literally stepped over the victim as he hurried on his way in spite of the fact that he was told the parable of Good Samaritan, (a story about compassion) before he was sent to the other building.
The words 'Oh you are so late' had the effect of making someone who was ordinarily compassionate into someone who was indifferent to suffering- of turning someone, in that particular moment, into a different person.
That's the Power of Context. What this study is suggesting, in other words, is that the convictions of your heart and the actual contents of your thoughts are less important, in the end, in guiding your actions than the immediate context of your behavior.
In a nutshell, we can stop being judgmental if we understand the context of a person's behavior or background of an event.


C) The Vicious Circle

Background- There is a human tendency to collapse what happened, with the story we tell what happened. The collapsing happens so fast that it is hard to separate the two and we think of them as one and the same. And over time the story we tell ourselves becomes the way it is - the reality we know. It limits what is possible in our lives, robbing us of much our joy and effectiveness.

For example:
Imagine you walking on the road and someone you know from your locality who is also very friendly with you, is walking towards you from the opposite direction. However, as you come closer, that person suddenly decides to cross over to the other side without as much looking at you, forget acknowledging your presence. Leaving you feeling awkward with half a smile left on your face..and a little hurt with this sudden 'turn' of events.
The immediate interpretation we make out of the situation at that time is, he/she has ignored you purposely or he/she may be upset with you over something that may have happened and hence purposely overlooked you.
Now if you look at it objectively, the situation was simple, the person in his/her sheer absent-mindedness must have crossed the road and not even realized the presence of you, who was walking towards him/her. May be he/she was engrossed in his own thoughts/problems, you never know!
But the interpretation of this situation has already been created in your mind and that becomes the reality for you. So every time you both meet, there would be some situations where you will try to find ways to justify that your friend always ignores you and then that becomes a Vicious Circle.

D)Rackets - Pay off and cost

A Racket is an unproductive way of being or acting that includes a complaint that something shouldn't be the way it is. Often, we don't notice that while our complaints may seem justified or even legitimate, there is a certain payoff- some advantage or benefit we are receiving that reinforces the cycle of behavior. At the same time, this way of being has steep costs, whether in our vitality, affinity, self expression or sense of fulfillment.

For example:

In a relationship with your spouse or parents or even a close friend, do you always have a typical complaint which you use to win an argument or get better of a situation? You may be justified in that complaint or it may be legitimate as well, but have you seen that just because you want to win that argument or get some benefit in that short term you invariably use it as a trump card.
What we don't realize is that it very much stifles the relationship and does not help us to take it to the next level of happiness, fulfillment or satisfaction in that relationship. That's why its important to let go off the past, let go of these rackets because only thing that matters is what we choose to be now or choose to see now.

E) Access to being Extraordinary (In the language of Landmark Forum)
"Each of us would like to be extraordinary; to have our lives matter, to excel in the areas that are important to us - our families, our work, relationships, our financial futures. Every day we are presented with the opportunity either to live a 'business as usual' life, or to create something beyond who we've been and what we know. To explore the opportunity that we have to express ourselves individually and fully, to set aside current standards, to question firmly held assumptions, to be at ease no matter what the circumstance and to break and reinvent the mould."

Thank you Landmark!!!

A Landmark in my life - Part I

Dictionary meaning Landmark : -a significant or historic event, juncture, achievement, etc.

This is it how it goes..a snippet of a conversation between me and my friend some time back....
"Oh...ok, so you are planning to do the Landmark Forum. But why?? Are you going through any problems in your life or at work or something. Isn't it the place where people eventually go to when things go topsy turvy in their life".
Now that was a question I had heard just recently many times over, as soon as I had announced to the world about my intention to do the Forum. As if attending Landmark forum was the most perceptible thing to do ONLY if you hit the most stumbling roadblocks of your life and not because you want to see yourself transformed into a better human being. Which is what it does largely and the real reason for my enrolling.
My reply for the nth time was an indignant "NO" but this time I just didn't care to explain the 'why?'. I was in no mood for any reasoning and also didnt want to temper the bubbles of curiosity which I knew were frothing in my friends' head about the so called imaginary (imagined by her)'problems' in my life.
So with a sadistic glee I just let the conversation die a premature death.

Flashback to 2 months before, where it all started.
'So what is this Landmark forum all about?" an innocent question to my hubby, Ashish when I first heard about it and also his interest in attending the forum. He had mentioned to me earlier that he had heard about it from an ex colleague who had been urging him to attend it and he had been brushing it off like any inconsequential event.

His answer to my question was even more quizzical and left me begging for more answers. All he said was if I needed to know more, I had to attend it personally and there were no easy answers.
Since it all sounded exciting and intriguing, I surmised there must be something in it. Also, its not everyday that my hubby gets interested in something new other than Football, Old cinema, History & Wikipedia(very much in that order). Very difficult indeed to get him hooked on..a complete snob for new interests!

His willingness to finally relent looked liked the proverbial case of the curious cat having bitten him.
So when he told me he was attending the Landmark forum, "So be it, go ahead and attend!" ...I muttered to myself half happy, not that he was asking my expert opinion but I wanted to think so.

Back after 3 days of the intense sessions of Landmark forum when I finally met him, I actually refused to recognise him! It wasn't like he did the SRK makeover act from "Rab ne bana di..." on me nor had he turned into a Mark Darcy from "Pride and Prejudice" and was wooing me on bended knee. But yes, I definitely saw a transformed Ashish..'new and improved' as folks from HLL and P&G claim for all their brands. Forgive the pun, but the reason why I am saying this is, I heard him saying something to me which truly left me drop jaw astounded. And it made me ask him, "Are you alright? Hope you are ok!!!"...when actually I wanted to ask him was "Have you lost it or are you on drugs?" But somethings are better not said especially when they (hubbys')are being nice to you. What he was telling me was what every spouse would love to hear but gets in short dosage typically. He had said those 3 magical words "I love you" and almost in the same breath, "I am sorry!" ...the next 3 magical words again any spouse would love to hear and also gets it in small doses. Well...all I did was soak in the moment and enjoy the warm fuzzy feeling as they say which accompanies these golden words..wishing that the minutes of this conversation turn to hours and more. It was too good to be true..like a typical ' I had to pinch myself' situation. After hearing those magical words, its anybody's guess that what followed was mere shaking of head and a stunned absent minded acknowledgment from my side to what he was saying... when inside I was still reeling under the wave of emotions which had welled up out of the blue.
As I was gathering my wits and absorbing every word that was leaving his jaw, the coup de grace that sealed the conversation was "I think you must also experience the Landmark forum. Its good you know."

With these words of his, I came back into the real world.
But I just left it at that, least bothered about his last statement. I accepted this to be one of my good days not to come again so soon and expecting to see the real Ashish again the next morning...sober, practical and not fuzzy like the previous night.


But surprise surprise! The facade had not slipped and what I thought was going to be a dream run ..was actually a full marathon. 1, 2 , 3, 4.....10 days...2 weeks passed but it was still going strong. And then I was eventually convinced that it was not just a facade he was wearing but a real transformation. And mind you, it wasn't just words but actions as well.

By then I had also heard a lot of new terms in those many days BE COMPLETE, RACKETS, STRONG SUITS etc which were new to me but equally mysterious. Even though they sounded like the simplest of words, I was sure they had a deeper meaning which I was looking to unravel and that too at the earliest.

Cut to present....
The day had arrived and I was going to attend my Landmark forum. I had been, in the past couple of months, looking forward to this day after having witnessed the positive after effects on someone dear who had attended it.

What was in store for me? I didnt know. But I was ofcourse ready for a myriad of experiences - high and low, revelations, discoveries and looking into the unknown dark places in my mind which I never knew existed.

End of Part I

Birth of Innocence

Dear Masoom Pears,
There's a popular saying which goes like this, 'A child gives birth to a mother' and when I heard it for the first time I wondered what it meant and scoffed at the possible meaning. Years later now having experienced the joys of motherhood, there cant be a truer statement than that in my life.
Having Anvita in my life now, has transformed me totally and made me realize the strength and true meaning of this phrase. Her innocent questions, angelic smile, her pure laughter and gentle touch, her sweet face and all of that makes my day truly complete just being with her.
At 5 years she is a complete live wire, vivacious, witty and bundle of energy. And true to her name which means 'The one who bridges the gap', she always makes new friends wherever she goes and also stays in touch with them.
Being all that its not a surprise that she loves to go and out and play with friends every evening, run around and on bad days end up with scratches and bruises. One of those bad days when she had bruised herself and was back home early she happened to see the Masoom Pears soap TV commercial when her grand parents were watching TV. She was totally fascinated by the jingle and the mother-daughter relationship shown in it. So when I returned home from work that day she immediately ran to me and with tears welling up in her eyes she showed me her bruised elbow and through her sobs she insisted that I give her a bath with Masoom Pears soap only. I asked her why Pears? She told me that she had seen the ad on TV and now she wanted to have bath with Masoom Pears from then onwards. When I heard her tell me her innocent reason, I almost had tears in my eyes. She said that she also wanted to have as much fun while having bath like the little girl in the ad did with her mamma.

Rest they say is history...Anvita has got a new friend, Pears soap and as regards me, I have been hooked onto Pears soap thanks to Anvita my dearest daughter, who true to her name has bridged the gap between us and Pears in her Masoom way.

Thank you Pears for helping Anvita enjoy her bath everyday.

Warm regards,
Anvita's mamma, Aparna

Chor Police

When we were young many(many many) years ago..well, I am talking on behalf of all 30 and 40 somethings here... about 20 years back...we used to play a thrilling game called 'Chor Police'. Oh! How we used to love being the Chor because then we could stay hidden without being caught and wait (or rather not wait)for the moment when someone would discover our new hiding place which only you or your team knew about, till then. The thrill we used to get, to know that we were undiscovered through the whole evening when your friends playing police used to frustratingly search high and low and even beyond the boundaries of the compound (yes, we did 'step over the line' sometimes) looking for the 'chors' that is us, but to no avail.
Staying put for hours together in that secret place half sweating and half wanting to pee badly...would still not deter us from leaving that 'comfort zone'...in spite of the fact that we were these bunch of hyperactive and adrenaline charged kids.
No one would love to 'don the cap' of the police as it was so uninteresting and a boring chore... searching, sniffing for trails, lurking, inquiring for clues and when discovered, chasing the nimble chors across the dusty playgrounds, hopping over small and big muddy water holes attempting to get their hands at catching the slippery chors...but alas no such luck. The sweaty palms of the police some how could never catch hold of the sweatier backs of the chors. Because being a chor always had the distinct advantage of 'one running as if to save his dear life' like how a prey does while the police were just running 'to earn that big badge'..not as desperate I would think. Playing the chor in a nutshell, was more exciting to me as a kid than being the respected but boring police.
Cut to 25 years later......the wordchor and also in the real sense has become such a ignominious word in our lexicon that it has completely lost the innocent sheen around it as in 'chor police' of yesteryears.
Now of course we are all grown up and grown out of 'chor police' days and have well realized that its not good to play the 'chor' anymore. So when we hear about these stories in newspapers and TV and sometimes from close acquaintances about they being at the receiving end of some good for nothing petty thieves or conniving home burglars or some such remaining ilk...it makes you livid, makes your blood curdle and make you wish you had at least one fighting chance with any of these rascals and you would knock the hell out of them. But knocking out was a good option only if you knew one of those Jackie Chan moves or Mithunda's dance kicks of Disco Dancer. Otherwise for the majority of us who did not grow on the staple diet of Bruce lee movies....only 1 option was available...that is using a can of pepper spray, blinding them out and kicking them in that 1 place which would make them remember their 'nani' for their next 7 births. But where do you get Pepper cans...somebody please tell me!

I always used to dream (or rather nightmare)about it.....this sequence of the Chor stealing something from me, on this cold, lonely and dark road and I helplessly trying to scream out 'Help' or 'Catch Thief' but somehow the words never seemed to come out...always! As if the throat had suddenly gone dry and parched just when I needed it most. And then I used to wake me up scared and sweating. After realizing that it was just a dream...with a huge relief would go back to my sleep. I am sure many of us have experienced this dream one time or another...in their life time so far.
Ok....even of this story and my filmy dream. Let me not play the chor police drama with you anymore. So what am I trying to say here is...what if.... what if this sequence from your dream (or nightmare in this case) actually becomes a reality and you are faced with a situation where you really are part of a chor police like situation. What do you actually do?
This is where the actual story begins.
One fine Saturday evening, hubby and me after our long walk in the greens of Aarey Milk colony area, headed towards the Hanuman temple like we always did. Me in my newly acquired pair of Adidas sports shoes was all gung-ho in spite of my tired feet. Sometimes, wearing something new for the first time gives you that extra energy and you get all pumped up...i feel. Its another thing that you end up with your feet in hot water tub when you reach home...but that's another point, let me not digress.
Coming back to the story...both of us, all tired and sweating from the walk reached the temple just in time before the evening Aarti started. I had recently come to know about my FIL's shoes getting stolen from outside another temple just a few days back, so I was in two minds about leaving my brand new shoes worth over 3k behind unattended. I thought maybe my hubby should go in first and then I would enter the temple after he came out. But then I said no, this is a safer area and no one had heard about shoes getting stolen, not from this temple at least.
So we decided to go in together. My hubby went inside and while I was removing my shoes slowly, I could sense a pair of eyes staring at me and my squeaky new shoes in a very obnoxious way. My sixth sense realized that all was not safe here. So I removed my shoes even more slowly and moved just a little bit towards the temple while still keeping a watch from the corner of my eye on those prying eyes. It must have been less than half a minute that I turned my back to face the god and after few moments when I suddenly turned behind, as if on instinct to take a look at my shoes they were not there. That's when I saw this man in his 30's, that is owner of the prying eyes, conveniently slipping on his feet into my shoes and making a quick dash towards the exit.
I swung and ran towards him and started screaming chor..chor all at the same time. (women are good at multi-tasking, you see)Thank you god, my throat also did not disappoint when I needed it most. All of a sudden, the entire temple sprang into an action movie mode from the devotional mode it was in, a few moments back. Me in my socks ran after him all the way down the road almost like I did when we used to play chor police. The scene was straight out of a movie..me running after him yelling chor chor and he running desperately like a prey who did not want to get caught. After about 400 meters, get caught he did as he ran straight into a bunch of teenagers walking towards our direction. With my top of the lung screaming, they realised that what was running towards them was a hare caught in a headlight scared for life.
And then...the usual scene followed where the mob decided to have a free hand at the rogue and hurled the choicest abuses at him. In the mean time I had noticed that this thief while he was denying he had done any wrong, was not wearing my shoes. I got suddenly petrified as the prized prey after whom I ran like never before...(at least not after I ran in the running race on school sports day in my 7th standard)...was not prized any more.
Where were my shoes????
That's when after much collaring, the drunken rogue confessed that he had left them by the temple after realizing that he could not run fast enough with someone like me behind his back. I quickly ran back to the temple and heaved a sigh of relief on seeing my gleaming pair all unattended but still lying safely by the road and calling out to their momma.

All this while when the drama was unfolding outside the temple, which was a matter of just five minutes, my hubby had realized that I was no where inside the temple premises and got worried as to where I disappeared out of the blue. He also heard a flurry of commotion outside the temple so he stepped out hoping to find me. Not knowing that I was reason for the commotion my hubby after seeing me right in the middle of the collected crowd, walked up to me very innocently asked me where I was all this while. I could not help but smile and said to myself 'Living my chor police dream and enjoying it too!!! God had finally given me my fighting chance with a chor and how exhilarating it was.

Just for your information, what happened after this drama was that with the help of local people we sent the thief to the police station and got him locked up. I don't know if it would mean that he will change his ways but I surely did not want to let him off...after all we already had 1 pair of shoes (my FIl'S shoes) out there, up for sale for peanuts by one such drunkard thief.

So what's the Moral of the Story
'Sometimes you don't need a pair of Adidas or NIKE shoes to help you run faster, even a pair of socks would do'

Tale of two cities!

With a name like that for a blog post, one could at once get an attack of a 'blast from the past'. Fond memories from school of your favorite English teacher mouthing lines from the timeless classic.

But no!...this is not about Charles Dickens and his evergreen literary work and nor about the cities of London and Paris like in the famous 'Tale of Two Cities'.

Its about my favorite city Mumbai where I live and the other, a city I just visited recently - Philly (for the uninitiated - Philadelphia). Though I hate to show my favorite city in a bad light I cannot resist a comparison between the two. Even though they both have rich historical leanings to boast of, the similarities quite simply end there. They are proverbially speaking, as different as chalk and cheese.

Let me start with what I saw, heard and which conquered my heart in and about Philly during my brief stay of two weeks.

To begin with, I would like to introduce you to Philly as 'City of Murals'. Why? Because the guide, a young chap with tongue in cheek humour on the hop on-hop off bus of Philly tour said so. And I completely bought it. It seems Philly has around 3000 murals spread across the city, that too more than any other city in USA and that is why it gets the name. You can see murals in all sizes, colours, themes, objects, types of people, scenery and painted across all kinds of buildings, facades, backs and sides..they really make a pretty picture and add a lot of character to the city, I must say. But do you know how these murals came about.

Its an interesting story. The murals were initiated as part of a six week youth program meant for anti-graffiti activity. Which means a lot of youth from socially backward areas in Philly used to indulge in defacing the city walls out of sheer frustration, disregard for the system and callousness of civic sense. A young muralist in 1984 saw an opportunity to use Murals as a soft (brush) weapon for steering these youth towards a more meaningful art rather than ugly graffiti. As is the rule with any graffiti artist, they respect each others art so when they had murals to be painted on city walls it was not difficult to have works of murals being left untouched without any defacing attempts by fellow painters. Also, the murals helped them to bring out the best creativity, earn some pocket money and also helped to change the look of the city and create an enduring legacy through each of these unique murals. As is written about in a book, the process was as much an art of diplomacy and consensus building, as paint and perspective. It also helped to remove stigma around addiction and homelessness, the victims of which were largely and actively involved in the mural program.

Such a program eventually turned Philly into 'City of Murals' on the tourist map. All in all a fantastic program which a city successfully used for betterment of its less privileged citizens, create a vibrant city, provide it a unique character different from other cities and eventually making it a tourist attraction that leads to filling up the kitty of the city municipality. A brilliant idea, well executed!

And now coming to Mumbai where I stay, work and very much (try to) breathe. If the beautiful and vibrant Mural culture is characteristic of Philly then I am sorry to say...the ugly and gross hoarding (billboard) culture is characteristic of Mumbai cityscape. And more despairing is the fact that all these illegal hoardings are largely put out by political parties who are meant to ensure the city's civic sense intact and keep surroundings clean.

But hello...what is civic sense? they ask.

No one has heard about it here, so there they go plastering any available inch of city wall with horrendous hoardings with even more ugly looking faces of themselves looking sneeringly at the poor souls like you and me. Either these hoardings are meant to announce the arrival of some senior politician in town or a wannabe wishing his/her Guru on birthday or simply wishing the citizens (who don't care a rat's ass) a ''Happy Diwali, Christmas, Dassera or Eid''.

Well...what we really care for is the city and its surroundings. Even if there has been a law that has been passed to not allow political parties to push their ugly menacing faces into ours they still do that. And worse...get away with it! How I wish that if looks could really kill, then I would stare hard with my 'killer' looks at all these illegal hoardings and they would drop down from these hoardings like nine pins and perish into thin air (poof!). Alas! the hoardings don't perish nor the faces that adorn them. That's the sad but true story of Mumbai so far.

Coming back to Philly...I had heard about this unique and must see touristy place called the 'Liberty Bell' and the history around it. With Philadelphia being the first national capital between 1790 to 1800 when Washington DC was being built, it adds more history to its existence than any other city in USA (mostly). Also Philly considered as the birthplace of American revolution and independence, the Liberty Bell became even more must see sightseeing attraction to me on paper...but alas was disappointed to see a Bell that size and nothing really much to crow about. I have seen much better bells than this one (keeping aside its history). 18th century is not really old considering Mumbai has much older history to it. But I was truly amazed by the hoopla and the marketing surrounding the same. The Americans surely know how to package their products and market them well. Lessons learnt, right.

Now compare this with our Elephanta Caves which are considered as old as 5th to 8th century AD. They have such fantastic and intricate rock cut Hindu and Buddhist sculptures, unfortunately not so well maintained as they are supposed to be. Also, the access to the island caves is much to ask for. 
The ferries are as rickety and noisy as my 95 year old granny's creaking cupboard....and only operational during non-monsoon period. The pier that is the landing strip is again strewn with plastic junk of all kinds which is not really a welcome sight. Only recently some efforts are being made for any restoration and maintenance of Elephanta caves. However, we surely lag far behind in appreciating the rich heritage that we have among us and we just cannot value the beauty and history which resides so close. Worse still, we cannot maintain it. Only if we can take a hard look at each of the unique historical structures remaining in Mumbai or any other city in India, maintain it, bring it to life and also package and market it well (like the Americans do). The amount of pride each citizen will have for his/her city will be immense. Not to mention that it will serve as revenue generation avenue (from tourists).

We can write reams and reams on what our authorities can do and must do to save our city. How about starting in our own backyard? 
Gandhiji's famous quote, 'Be the change you want to see in the world' makes so much sense even in this context.

- Let's stop littering our city with the remnants of our consumption   (choclate/wafers/other junk food) and instead dump it in your hand bag.

- Let's stop chucking out stuff from the backseat of your (fancy) car and instead carry it  home and dump it in your garbage can.

- Stop spitting...yes, I have seen the deepest red coloured spittoon swooping from the    back seat (not driver's seat)of the most latest Merc. 

- When on holidays in mountains/beaches (wherever) lets stop littering it with mineral  water bottles, plastic wrappers and instead take it back to hotel in case you don't see the  dust bin anywhere.

If each one of us shows patience and stops complaining about the unavailable resources we can surely start making a difference although small.

If we the 'supposed to be educated' souls first understand the importance of civic sense then only it can spread like a movement. Lets begin it soon before its too late. Or else....I see Bombay (which means 'Good bay' in Portuguese) soon becoming Slum bay.

Did I hear a ...'We are already one!' from someone. Ok, that was my inner voice.

Oh God! Really hope not!

Monsoon Song

To be sung in the tune of 'Tuzya Nanachi Taang'

Its that time of the year, when the same ol' fear reappears
Its time for us to scream out & bellow
BMC chya Nanachi Taang!

The  come down dear, as if in 4th gear
And then play havoc with roads, far and near
BMC chya Nanachi Taang!

Potholes, craters and bumpers leer
as if lusting for your tyre tears
makes you feel like a mortal mere
BMC chya Nanachi Taang!

Car rage, stress and repair bills
Becomes a part of the monsoon drill
Makes you holler even more
BMC chya Nanachi Taang!

We have had enough and more
Cant take this anymore
The roads, dust and the back sore
BMC chya Nanachi Taang!

Can we not all do something
to stop the rot and the done thing
make ourselves heard loud and clear
BMC chya Nanachi Taang!

So, when the time comes for next year
Dont let the same fear reappear
We can sing happily and once more
BMC chya Nanachi Taang!

Mumbai Darshan - Thoda Hatke

When you receive an email from your boss requesting you to escort a senior colleague visiting India, for Mumbai Darshan ...one doesn't have a choice, right! So, when me and my colleague received the email from our boss, we had the typical expression of 'Oh no, please spare me from this' on our face. Not just because it will mean escorting someone you have not met before but also because you are totally not sure about what their interests are. But third and most challenging task being finding places worth visiting in Mumbai from a phirang's point of view.
But escort we had to....whether we liked it or not.

With 2 weeks in hand we had a relatively good amount of time to do our homework and figure out which places that could be deemed as worth visiting. Also, had enough time to drop her a email to know her interests and we found out that she was interested in Indian culture, its temples, monuments and history. Hmmmm.... this was getting difficult than expected. The choice set was getting narrower by the day.Having stayed in Mumbai for all my life suddenly I found myself in a tight spot. My colleague had the comfort of being an outsider (she is from Belgaum)with limited knowledge of the city so obviously she magnaminously bowed out of the situation and so the onus was on me to provide all the expert knowledge on the city. As always Google Maharaj came to my rescue and whipped out a handful of delightful places which matched our guest's 'requirements'. The Google list threw up around 25 places in Mumbai which were culturally and historically oriented. Felt a little a comforted and surprised at the same time.
Comforted by the array of choices available to me now and surprised with my ignorance... ignorance about my city's 'historical' side.
The tripadvisor website actually came up with 34 places related to our city's historical inclinations.
(Visit for more info - http://www.tripadvisor.com/Attractions-g304554-Activities-c1- Mumbai_Bombay_Maharashtra.html#TtD)


After spending some more time going through the list I realised that out of the entire list may be only 5-6 places would be relevant and worth visiting considering the monsoons and time available with us.

The tourist's and my favourite Elephanta Caves was struck off the list almost immediately considering the rains and choppy seas, though it seemed the most obvious choice of interest for that day. Also some others could not make it to the list because of their far flung locations and time considerations.
After much head scratching the list was ready and which read as follows
Gateway of India
Price of Wales Museum (aka Chattrapati Shivaji Vastu Sangrahalaya)
Jehangir Art Gallery
Colaba Causeway
Lunch at Leopold (an attraction post 26/11)
Fab India (for Indian shopping)
Rajabai Tower
VT Station
Asiatic Library
Flora Fountain
Banganga
Malabar Hill
Mahalaxmi Temple
Worli Bandra Sea link

With my borrowed knowledge of Mumbai city from my fave book 'Fort Walks' I knew I could answer any question about the city. Also,my experience of Mumbai with Odati's Mumbai cycle ride last year had equipped me with enough exciting dope about city's history and interesting trivia.
(For more info visit http://www.odati.com/viewactivity.php?id=s-14)

The day finally arrived and luckily for us the sun had decided to push aside the grey clouds beyond the horizon and make his warm and sunny presence felt. Good for us, as Mumbai rains are best experienced from the cosy confines of your home.

We finally met our firang guest ....yes, ....at the pre decided time at the hotel she was staying. After a brief exchange of greetings and introductions it was absolutely clear to us then onwards that our day was going to be enjoyable and pleasant. Our apprehensions were laid to rest and we knew that our anxiousness of so many weeks was completely uncalled for. She is one of the most pleasant and warm person I have met till now. She has the personality which makes you feel comfortable and at ease. Absolutely no hang ups and attitude issues. May be her job profile has shaped her personality or may be she is naturally like that....I don't know. But all I can say is the day was well spent and passed like a breeze.
We had our share of laughs and interesting moments which were amusing more so for her. We were at Jehangir Art Gallery, walking down the hall appreciating the unique art and displays. Suddenly a family with their little son and daughters swooped on Brantlee and requested her to pose for a photograph with their little son. It seemed a little awkward but flattering at the same time for Brantlee, we felt at that moment. She felt like a celebrity that we could tell from her brimming smile. After couple of pictures, this time the entire family wanted to pose with her. She readily obliged, again. And after lots of thank yous and byes we moved away from them. She could not get over the situation very easily and then I explained to her the fascination we Indians have for white skin. That explained her brief celebrity moment. I must say she had a very keen eye and great observation. She asked a lot of questions about things which seemed new to her and we were also stumped for answers couple of times.
When we told her about reincarnations of Gods in various avatars, she wanted to know about re-birth and whether we believed in it. If yes, then did we know who we were in our previous births. A typical question of a logical and agnostic mind unfortunately for which we did not have exact answers. Another time she asked us the relevance of the lemon and chillies weaved together and hung below the cars bumper. Then she saw a woman with a monkey and she wanted to know if we kept them as pets as well. I think after seeing the array of the animals with cows included on the road, she wanted to hear a 'Yes' on that probably but was clearly disappointed on hearing the answer. At Prince of Wales museum she was mesmerized by the innumerous gods we worshiped across India, more so with Krishna and why he was called the Blue God and how he died. She obviously had great fascination for Buddha, spiritualism and whether India had good relations with Tibet. We were not surprised to know that she practiced Yoga. But she definitely was shocked when she came to know that none of us in the India team practiced Yoga. May be she thought Yoga was way of life for us Indians, but she was mistaken. That's when I understood that as Indians we easily imbibe lot of unnecessary/unhealthy fads, habits from the West but the West however tends to borrow the best from what we have to offer.
She knew about the 26/11 terrorist attacks and wanted to know who was the main target for the attacks considering a lot of foreigners also got killed, especially the Jews. Being American, I think she was seeking some pointed answers.

Traveling in the car passing by rows of trees she was intrigued by the white and brown stripes uniformly painted on some trees and wanted to know why it was like that. She thought it had some religious significance. I must say she was studying the Mumbai city landscape very studiously and almost expected logical answers for every unique characteristic. I guess since it was her first time in India, she was hungrily devouring all the sights that the city had to offer not to mention the people and their clothes and wares.
And lastly on our last leg of the tour when we were going towards Banganga Temple she was approached by 2 young boys who thrust her with a piece of paper and asked her for her autograph. I guess by then Brantlee had got used to her fan following and 'celebrity' status so with great panache she signed off on the paper the boys had presented her and walked off with a bounce in her gait. What she didn't see was the disappointed expression on the faces of those kids as if they had expected something more. Well, expect more they did. As that the paper was not part of a autograph book but meant for donations collected towards some institution.

Thus with numerous such vivid experiences packed in our minds, the day came to an end quickly. A wonderful day which started with lot of apprehensions unwarranted but later made eventful and an absolute delight,thanks to our lovely guest Brantlee who we wish will come back again soon.

Conversation with GOD!

An interesting piece I came across which I would like to share with all...

Conversation with GOD!

God: Hello. Did you call me?

Me: Called you? No.. who is this?

God: This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.

Me: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am in the midst of something..

God: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.

Me: Don't know. But I cant find free time. Life has become hectic. It's rush hour all the time.

God: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results. Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.

Me: I understand. But I still can’t figure it out. By the way, I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.

God: Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time, by giving you some clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you through the medium you are comfortable with.

Me: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?

God: Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

Me: why are we then constantly unhappy?

God: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become your habit. That's why you are not happy.

Me: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?

God: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

Me: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty..
God: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

Me: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?

God: Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don't suffer. With that experience their life becomes better not bitter.

Me: You mean to say such experience is useful?

God: Yes. In every terms, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test
first and the lessons afterwards.

Me: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why cant we be free from problems?

God: Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons (to)Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

Me: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don't know where we are heading.

God: If you look outside you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

Me: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do?

God: Success is a measure as decided by others.. Satisfaction is a
measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than
knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the
clock.

Me: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?

God: Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have
to go. Always count your blessing, not what you are missing.

Me: What surprises you about people?

God: when they suffer they ask, "why me?" When they prosper, they never ask "Why me". Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Me: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here. I cant get the answer.

God: Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

Me: How can I get the best out of life?

God: Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

Me: One last question. Sometimes I feel my prayers are not answered.

God: There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

Me: Thank you for this wonderful chat. I am so happy to start the New
Day with a new sense of inspiration.

God: Well. Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts
and doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve, not a problem to
resolve. Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

"Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be."

A dedication to my dear parents (Aai and Pappa)

"If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging."
-Diane Loomans

A very sweet poem written by a parent who wishes she could rewind to the time in past when she first became a mother and do all the things differently.

Well, as for me I feel blessed that I am a daughter (count my sister in) of those parents who don't have to sit in a time machine and go back into the past and change the way they brought us up. Its simply been a wonderful journey...Our childhood...with both mom and dad (aai and papa as we call them)bringing up two daughters exactly as Diane Loomans (author of the poem) would have loved to bring up her children as conveyed through her poem.
I am sure all my friends will also agree to being lucky for being brought up the way they have been by their loving and doting parents. But how many times in our daily lives do we actually acknowledge this fact and give back at least half of what they have given till date.
Well....this post is exactly that..A dedication to my parents.

I am what I am today...thanks to my parents and their wonderful upbringing. We (me and my sis) are indeed lucky to have them as our parents. Life has been very tough for them like any normal middle class couple would experience but never ever did they make us (me and my sis) aware of that. There were more troughs than peaks in their life when we were young and growing up but they surmounted all of them with equal poise and a quiet strength. Whether it was about fighting against the builders/ promoters in the courts of law for many many years for the home which they had invested with their hard earned money and which was rightfully theirs...or battling with an erstwhile leading MNC where my father worked ( which later filed for bankruptcy), for the Gratuity sum from service of more than 20 years. The hard work and incredible courage which my father quietly displayed is something I will never forget.
Perseverance and dedication are 2 virtues which I realized in my early life thanks to them.
When my Aai and Papa recount those old days about what really happened back then...me and my sister are completely overwhelmed as they never made us overtly aware of the sweat and the tears of the trying times.
Also, whether it was illnesses and days when we were going through some what economically trying times, we still had our celebrations on birthdays or festivals and even indulged in shopping like any other normal family would. We went to almost all the beautiful cities across India every summer vacation. And if not a new place it was surely Goa (Mangeshi Temple) our native place which we all loved to go back to again and again.

If commuting in taxis was a comfortable mode of transport back then (30 years back) my dad would not hesitate to call for one in spite of the given situations. But all this while he used to work...work like a dog at office, come back home and still find time to take his wife and kids to the beach or park at nearby Shivaji Park or a movie theater or something similar.

Besides that they groomed us into good human beings who do not grow at the cost of others or stepping on others toes. They taught us the importance of hard work, integrity, sacrifice, self respect and sincerity. They also taught us the meaning of unrequited love and kindness. We understood from them that life some times throws at us difficult and sometimes happy moments but its important to keep our balance, be grounded and understand that this too shall pass.
They always encouraged all our fancies whether it was learning to sing, swimming, learning the guitar, joining sports clubs and many other extra curricular activities which we evinced interest in. At the same time they did not give in to many of our other undeserved fanciful demands.Value of hard earned money is what we learnt through them.

Not to forget the important lesson of using our heart when dealing with our near and dear ones and using our head in the professional world or strangers, which will remain with me forever.

Thanks to the wonderful upbringing inculcated in us by our parents, we strive to pay it forward in our every day life with people we know and don't know sometimes. Isn't that the most beautiful process when you can lead your daily life with a wonderful conscience and a warm heart.

As sons and daughters I am sure we all try to ensure that our parents get all the comforts which we can provide them, a helping hand when the situation arises and meet all their requirements which typically arise in the sunset of their life. But what we don't realize is that more than all the above, they just want to be heard, they want to talk to their kids who are now busy in their careers and have meaningful conversations just like they had in the earlier days.
Now when they are old, (not as old as they would like to think because 60 is the new 40)and have grown up children (we) all they look forward to is tete a tete with their loved ones. They seem to be so happy when you call them and share your daily experiences that it completely makes their day. So I have suddenly realized as I am writing this post that the daily routine (which we consider) of calling them every day is their much required dose of adrenalin. They really look forward to our calls and when it doesn't come through on a day they are worried sick about us whereas we are blissfully ignorant about their feelings.
Also, some times when they have to call us during our office hours, due to pressing demands at work we either let it go as a missed call or hurriedly cut short the conversation. For us it is just another call which can be answered later but to them it means the most sometimes. Nothing is more important than your dear ones, believe me! Especially when they are trying to reach you when you are busy, the least we can do is hear them out or politely tell them that u will call them back. They just want a kind hearing after all they have been patient with us for so many years when we were growing. This is the least we can do for them.

Also, a visit to their place brings such good cheer to them. You just have to see their beaming faces and it says it all. Even at their age they like to pamper us so much, it some times embarrasses me....do I really deserve this? They are ready to go on a limb to help and support us even at their age. Its truly amazing!

As parents don't most of us yearn for that special time with our kids which tends to make us feel younger and energized with the enthusiasm of the company, its exactly the same case here. So go ahead and make their day!

If you are happy for being who you are and look back on your childhood the same way I do, I m sure you will agree with me wholeheartedly.

If its been some time since you spoke to your folks, pick that phone and say hello or if possible, visit them, they will be pleasantly surprised. And if they stay with you, even better...just give them a big warm hug. You would surely give them a reason to smile. :)

Keep the faith!

Its 5 o clock on a Saturday morning and my eyes are already wide open. I can’t bear to see myself awake so early and hurting with pain on a weekend morning. From one side to another, tossing and turning, I am trying to make myself comfortable but as much as I try hard, the agonizing pain in my right shoulder seems relentless. Its not allowing me to sleep and I am wondering how someone who could wake up only with the sound of hundred trumpets and bugles is now up and awake even before the dawn sets in.
Devoid of sleep and tired of looking at the ceiling which has peeled off in the corner, I shift my gaze to the whirring fan on the ceiling. The sun’s gentle rays which are streaming in through the crack in the window are caressing the blades of the fan and are getting cut in a predictable manner with the motion of the fan. I am engrossed in this visual display for a brief time in which it allows me to escape from the unendurable pain of the moment. And lo, as if in flashback my thoughts take me back to the day almost 3 months ago.
It was a Sunday on 15th November and it was darker than it should be for a 5 am morning. It had rained the previous night which was quite unusual in the year for Mumbai. The sky was overcast from the night before with a few grey clouds still looming as if ominously. Today was the day when my parents were leaving for a 15 day holiday to Australia and I was only there since the previous night to help them do the last minute packing and to drop them off at the airport. It was unusual but I was a little anxious and nervous since the previous night and not just because of the unpredictable rain but as if something was going to happen, something not so good. I do surprise my self with my intuitive powers sometimes and when I look back now to that date of 15th November I was completely right about that anxious feeling.
I didn’t want my parent’s holiday to go kaput especially when they were looking forward to it since so many days. With all my heart, I wanted their holiday to go as planned and be an enjoyable one at that. But then this apprehensive feeling was completely overwhelming me. And then I knew exactly what I had to do. I had just mastered the basics of Reiki healing and it had taught me to use these prayers for healing of self or others or problem solving or for assuaging the fears of uncertain situations. And so I did. I fervently prayed using my Reiki mantras the previous night and went to bed. I prayed that my parent’s holiday be safe and enjoyable. The prayers helped me to reduce the uneasy feeling in my heart and I went to sleep with positive thoughts for company.
However what lay ahead does not surprise me especially when I look back. The flight was at nine in the morning on the day of November 15th and we had to reach the airport at least 2 hours early. So we had accordingly hired a private cab to pick us up at 6.30 am with the airport just half hour drive from my parent’s home. We were running 15 minutes late already and as expected my dad was seething with anger and excited at the same time but rightly so. The women had taken a little longer to get dressed than required. Stepping in the cab his temper continued. After a small argument with me and my mom he agreed to wear his seat belt. The driver was driving slowly as the roads had become slippery from the unseasonable rains and also the fact that the first rains are typically ominous for cars. We were cruising at 60 km per hour and were almost half way through the drive and when the car ahead of us came to a screeching halt out of the blue. Our cab driver luckily managed to stop the car within a hair’s breadth distance. But our sigh of relief was unfortunately short lived and within split seconds we all were violently shaken out of our seats and left shocked from a mighty blow from behind. A giant SUV was unfortunately trailing our cab at a faster speed and as luck would have it the driver could not get the giant machine to come to a grinding stop without banging into our cab from behind. After recovering from this shock the first thought that came to my mind was to check whether my parents were unhurt. Both were reeling under the shock but visibly unhurt. I was relieved to see my mom was not showing any visible signs of impact but was left with a bump on her forehead. My dad thanks to the seat belt was also fine and was now worried about reaching the airport on time rather than the accident and rightfully so. He saw the warring men outside pointing fingers at each other for the mayhem, so he stepped out of the car and did his best to calm the drivers. However when I look back, I wish I could have taken the SUV’s number down so I could sue him for the damage done to my right shoulder. Yes, in all this I had fractured my right shoulder and for the last 3 months have been nursing this slowly healing injury. It didn’t seem that fatal at that time and in fact I didn’t realize the pain till I dropped off my parents at the airport. Once home I suddenly started noticing the excruciating pain emanating from my right arm. So immediately was advised to go to orthopedic to rule out any internal injuries. So with my hubby in tow, I went to the doctor to realize it was a fracture of the right shoulder. This incident has completely changed my life and has forced me to become ambidextrous amongst many things. I have got the best support from my dear hubby and near and dear ones but most importantly made me realize that health is wealth and each of our organs if not in best shape can throw your life out of gear completely. We should be happy with what we have and make the most of what has GOD has given us. The only positive and most important aspect I could take away from this incident was that my parents escaped unhurt and could go on their holiday as planned. Was it because of the Reiki mantras I prayed that fateful night that my parents could enjoy their holidays, I don’t know, may be yes, may be no. But I surely would like to believe so and it as strongly reaffirmed my faith in this alternate healing process. After all faith does move mountains. But for now as I try to move my right hand it surely feels like a big mountain. May be not now but I know I will be able to move it like 3 months back very soon. Keep the faith!

face bhook!

Today I woke up to a news article in The Times of India on my favourite social networking site
(nowadays) take a guess which one!.....yeah you are right, Facebook. It says that India Inc. is facing a productivity loss of 12.5% per day thanks to the social networking sites. If translated into number of hours it means on an average, an employee works only for 7 hours out of the 8 hours at work. Rest of the time is spent on social networking sites. Chk the link for the article -http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/mumbai/Social-networking-plagues-India-Inc/articleshow/5429382.cmsms
Ofcourse there are those unlucky few (but thankfully not part of statistics) like me where the employers have banned/blocked usage of such sites in office. Did these statistics shock me...or anyone else for that matter. I doubt it very much. Isnt it that what everyone is addicted to for the last so many months. In fact if you are not yet part of the Face Book bandwagon you could be considered a social outcast and a not 'with it' person. Either you are sent a friend invite to join FB or you just join it to check what everyone's talking so passionately about. It would be difficult to meet one of your friends who is not yet been bitten by this worm. They say nowadays the social profile of a person is recognised as ' Either you are a Face Booker' or not. Its like either you have or you dont.
Well, one person will disagree and thats ur truly's husband, because he has not only NOT created a profile yet on FB but I doubt he will be doing so in near future, especially seeing me affected by this new addiction surely he thinks he can do without it. Also that when I am on FB, its as if he is not there...well, thats what he says. Since FB has become one of my top 10 activities in the day, it is almost one of the top 10 reasons why we fight. And I am sure he is waiting for the day when he can say,'I told you so....' and win the battle for him. I would not only like to prove him wrong but also get him 'FaceBooked'
So you FB is creating tremors not only at office but also at home. And taking a cue of this social phenomenon, rightly so in its usual 'Amul' brand of humour we saw this FB hoarding towering over us from various city buildings. When 'Amul's' ad propogates any brand, its a clear measure of its cult status and establishes its popularity.

And as my blog post title reads, I can safely say that we have indeed been possessed by this all 'consuming' brand so much so that we 'Eat FB, Live FB and sleep FB'.
And I am sure the increasing numbers of FB users which at last count was 350 million users worldwide will all agree with the above statement.
Whats more?
That I could meet my school friends after 20 years....was one of the biggest event of my life of 2009. 125 batch mates who would have never have dreamt of meeting up on one common ground after two decades and reliving the grand ol' memories of quarter century back. It was truly pure, magical, ethereal and almost unbelievable feeling when we had the Reunion bees saal baad . A special evening, moments of which I have been reliving almost every minute since that day. And all this thanks to FB.
Yes, truly its helped me and millions others across the world reconnect with long lost friends from school, colleges, office and how! Its just not a social networking site but a brand which everyone wakes up to and goes to sleep with. Can their be any other brand as popular and addictive as this...i guess may be Colgate toothpaste comes closest (just joking) but there again...one is by habit and the other is pleasure. You dont get excited looking at your toothbrush in themorning/night as much as you do by checking ur FB profile with the latest updates from your pals.
Also, there was another article which I happened to read today which does not directly relate to FB but it has the potential to be. It says the power of how a tighly knit group of enlightened people can bring about a positive change not just at a micro level but at a national level by having a common agenda. And I think FB has the power for that to happen. If all on FB from India believe that we need a stronger governance, no corruption, no land grabbing by builders, timely and appropriate justice delivered by the judiciary, no illegal encroachments,proper planning of projects, open grounds, no cutting trees and importance of education/infrastructure in eradicating poverty then our time has come to use FB in the right direction and make it a lethal tool to wipe out the thugs who are ruling the country in the name of politicians.
Why dont we use FB to pursue common goals such as these. As the cliche goes, its an idea whose time has come!

Read below article for the context -
http://epaper.timesofindia.com/Repository/ml.asp?Ref=VE9JTS8yMDEwLzAxLzEwI0FyMDI0MDI=&Mode=HTML&Locale=english-skin-custom
So you see its not just a social networking site to meet your old pals and get together for reunions but it could be used as a tool for Unions of a different kind, Unions of Intellectuals who crave for doing something constructive for their nation and community. As I am sure that there are hundreds and thousands of Indians who have always wanted to do something for the city and country but did not know what to do and where to go.
Thinking aloud....May be a National newspaper can tie up with Facebook and create a community online for such Indians which could be BIG force to reckon with. And why not, there are already many groups formed based on social issues but we need a consolidated group which will cover all the problems which we as Indians face day in and day out and members can then nominate themselves for sub groups within this group for issues which are close to their heart. And icing on the cake would be to have a social (genuine)celebrity to campaign for this National cause.
To conclude, all I can say is that Facebook has the power to become a 'socially' relevant brand!

A Reunion after 20 years! - A small tribute

As I am writing this post, the one song that keeps humming in my head and playing on my lips constantly is 'Summer of 69', the feelings are exactly the same. And undoubtedly what I am going to write is about 'The Best days of my (our)Life' with emotions running high just like Bryan Adams must have, when penning the cult song of our generation.


Its been exactly 6 days since I have met them, my ol' friends but the sweet taste of the hangover is still there and will savour it forever!


It was a reunion after 20 years for IES batch 89 and what a memorable evening it was. It still gives me goosebumps and my mind goes in overdrive as if its fed on endorphins, when I think about that special evening.





Days before Reunion

I had been eagerly waiting for the D-day to arrive almost akin to a kid's excitement waiting to unwrap his birthday gifts. Well, it couldnt have been any other way, as I was to meet my long lost friends after 20 years (phew!)and catch up with them on all those wonderful 12 years that had been spent at our dear school IES, Hindu Colony....in classrooms, in its corridors, labs, on the school ground, recesses, picnics, canteens, PTA's,school programs and the list is endless.


IES our school... an epitome of a school factory. A factory because it used to be (still does)always teeming with us...school kids. Whether in classroom, school buses, at school gates or just about everywhere...and it was like a real melting pot, a reflection of our city Mumbai, in a sense. We were from all cross sections of life, truly all kinds there... and importantly we loved it for its bigness and diversity....which had in its fold so many children who eventually were to become friends for life.

Such strong is our feeling and attachment for the school that one cannot leave without feeling fervently or impassioned for it. We love it, adore it, complain about it, we are passionate about it also sometimes (yeah, sometimes) talk disparagingly about it but at the end of it we are happy we are part of it and are truly proud of it!


So it was but obvious that the days spent before the grand day were spent in pure anticipation as to what will unfold on the D day. I was actually running in my head the sequence of events which were to take place .. A huge eagerness with a little nervousness and lot of excitement. Will they or wont they recognise me (classmates)...do I look old/young for my age.....have I put on weight...have I done well enough for myself in the last 20 years and what if my friends have done better (or worse). It was like all of a sudden, I was going through a self assessment at the 20 year milestone. But I am sure I was not alone.

But what the hell...there was even more stronger thought that plagued my mind...I was meeting my bunch after 2 whole decades and I was all gung ho for a Deja vu... memories 20 years old which I wanted to revive so badly...that I wanted to walk down that lane all over again...again and again!



I was to meet about hundred batch mates...some close friends...some few friends who I had lost touch, some I knew barely and still some I may not have spoken in school at all. But the common link being we were all a bunch of 35 years old who had for the last 20 years been strewn all over the city, country or world and were to meet again and renew the memories which we had saved in that special place (heart) and could only be revived by us...the batch of 89 by being there all together!




D-Day arrives


Date - 19th December 2009

Place - Worli Police Swimming Pool

Time - 6 pm

Setting - Reunion of IES 1989 batch after 20 years



Firstly, as I stepped on that turf and just being there made me feel 20 years younger almost instantly...it was like I had sat in a time machine and flown back to a place in time which I can describe as 'shiny and happy'..it was 80's remember.





It was the time of homeworks (not done), sitting on the last bench (and chatting during class), black shoes/white socks (uff!), red hairbands(never worn), crushes (and thereafter, feeling crushed), PT exercises (and the art of slacking off), short recess (biscuits) and long recess (chapati/bhaaji), the art of sharing dabba with your gang, being in classroom (but not really being there), being an outstanding student (for truly standing outside class), ranks and report cards (such a pain ) and many such wicked memories.





Coming back to the reunion...I was happy to meet all and mind you all...whether I had known them in school or didnt. It didnt matter. The whole atmosphere was so magical and pure that its difficult to describe in words.





It started with...'oh you havent changed a bit'...or 'you look just the same' and for the others who we knew by face, ' I know u, but cant remember your name'...and sometimes it was...'Oh my god,Is that really you...' . 'where have u been's and 'what are you upto's. The ice breaking continued a good amount of time till we had gone out and met every single (almost) school mate.





Some had changed fairly and most of us squarely (pun of course intended) but we still remembered the face as it was. Somehow it surprised me that I could still rememb most of my 60-70 odd classmates and more names by heart but now if you ask me names of my past office colleagues...well, I could do a lot good with a 8 GB memory drive for my brain. I guess the computers and cell phones have spoilt us rotten.





And to top it all, the event was made even more precious by the presence of a few teachers who we revered and adored (still do). Seeing them again opened the floodgates of memories of a different kind...it was indeed special moment for us to have them in our midst and we will appreciate that truly. Thank you, mams!





The party continued with gusto for 6 hours thriving on great conversation, good food, lively music, flowing booze and more importantly company of some amazing friends. The air was absolutely thick with choked emotions, familiar laughs and old sentiments of long lost friends. The evening just flew by ...and how....we wished it would never end. The buzz, the excitement, energy, nostalgia and vibes of friends thrown together again has renewed my vigour and made me feel young(er) all over again. Those 6 hours of that special evening truly encapsulated (almost)the fantastic 12 years of my school years, beautifully. And but naturally we have decided to meet again....cos' its obvious we dont want to lose this momentum again....we cant wait for another milestone (20 years) to bring this evening into our life again. In a small way or big way...lets decide that this evening shall not pass as just another special day in our life never to come back again. Lets aim for many more to come.





To all my dear friends who could not make it on this evening and for those who were not aware...we dearly missed your presence and hence we would like to do this again to make it even bigger and cherishable as the evening of 19th Dec 2009. Lets set the ball rolling!





Last but not least, for those who made it happen...Hats off to you all!....Jaydeep Palep, Anand Mhapralkar, Abhijeet Avarsekar, Mangesh Choubal, Vasudev Rane, Geetanjali Subhedar, Shilpa Tawte and I am sure I must have missed a few more names....Please forgive my ignorance. Guys, you made it happen!





Lastly all I would like to say to my dear school, teachers and schoolmates...a song which is a dedication to all those who shaped me into becoming what I am today.





You are the wind beneath my wings!!

Life is a slinging match!

Imagine a right handed person suddenly has to stop using his/her right hand for doing the daily chores and make do with just a left hand....how must it feel....restricted, cramped, uncomfortable, slow, handicapped. Yes! All these and more feelings...well thats how i exactly feel right now....because thats my situation-literally & figuratively for the last few days. Which i must add that few days already seems like a zillion years.
And above all that you can add a dash of pain and slice of extra discomfort to make it a complete story of my life in a SLING!
Yes...its a fracture! confirmed the doc looking at the x ray and then at me woefully....fracture of my right hand, i said to myself and then I realised that its not just my bone which had broken (thankfully in one place only)but also my confidence in a surreal way. I now understand the importance of the 'feeling of independance' in literal sense because life has become a real slinging match, with me fighting for every single inch of flexibility every single moment and my broken bone denying it by gnawing at my inner muscles tearingly.

We in our daily grind of life take so many things for granted that we fail to appreciate what we already have and then BOOM! It hits you from behind so suddenly and severely... just like the car that banged into our car, that you are forced to look at the rear view mirror of life to assess what happened.

Well, this fracture has brought into being whole lot of factors which I never knew existed or even if existed never surfaced before.
-For starters, life can change in seconds...and i m not promoting DOCOMO here
-I got to see Ashish's (my hubby of course) sensitive and caring side. I had no iota of doubt in my mind about his capabilities as being loving and attentive but this incident gave him a chance to display that in full glory.
-I realised with this forced break, how much I mean to my friends, relatives & colleagues...with their concerned phone calls
-Also, how much ever you think you are important at the place of work....life goes on...sadly!
-Importance of a good night's rest as the broken bone has somehow got the knack of giving me broken sleep every single night.
- To look at positive side inspite of the situation as it helps you to deal with the situation easily
- Last but not least, the importance of being ambi-dextrous. Isnt that obvious given the condition this thought should be foremost in my mind!

So on this note, I hope to recover soon from my discomfort and at the same time gain more insights to help me sail through life's ups and downs more bravely.
Cheers!

Weight Challenge or Wait Challenge

I am so full of shame when I write this post about the much blogged about weight challenge which me and my dear friends Anu and Shilpa took up in June. Not only did I falter within few weeks because a holiday popped up but after I came back in 10 days I completely forgot about it conveniently. Likewise my friends who I am sure have also given up. Moreso Anu, as she is enjoying a holiday for the last month and a half - so you can safely count her out. Because I cant imagine her on a diet in the most consumerist countries of the world- USA/Canada....where all the food portions are meant for people who are neither vertically or horizontally challenged. Moreover you can get the most variety and yummiest of peanut butter and also potato chips and also ice creams...yummm....the list goes on. And as regards Shilpa I dont want to call her up lest she says...which weight challenge? As there is a strong likelihood that she also must have got a amnesia attack like me did and prefers to forget that 'it' ever happened. So here I am, after more than 3 months (it was to be a 3 month weight challenge) that I am writing a post mortem of the challenge which never was...hence Wait Challenge....looks it will have to wait some more time till I become more determined and focussed about following it.
But I am not alone, I take comfort in the fact that there are many and more out there who have had this attack of taking up the weight loss challenge and have not seen it till its end, faltering mid way or losing interest. Well, thats what statistics say! I wish the activity of thinking about losing weight itself could translate into actual weight loss. Isn't what they say, Its the thought that counts. So it should be here as well!
Anyway, jokes apart. This is serious!
A small piece of good news though is....since June when I was around 62.4 ks I have become 60 kgs in 3 months...dont ask me how.
May be the new weighing machine is being nice to me or my vision is blurring and I am 'seeing' things or may be my walking up to 5th floor office has really helped (btw I didnt stop walking up during this period). If I assume the last part is true, but that alone cant help me lose weight.
So I am still wondering...how did this happen.

Since I cant expect another miracle for sure, here I am back again looking forward to brighter tomorrow with a fighting spirit in tow. Raring to go after the next 3 kgs like a cheetah after a equally faster deer...because thats how tough its going to be.
All detemined so that I achieve my objective of 57 kgs....at least in 6 months if not in 3 months.
Amen!

Few of my favourite things

These are a few of my favourite things...

- Waking up to the smell of just rained wet soil and then realising there is still one more hour for wake up time and getting back in bed with the cozy blankets for company

- Eating the delicious and warm, hand prepared meal by my Aai which makes me even more hungrier with its delectable aroma

- When my dear hubby runs his hand through my hair and kisses me on my forehead

-Watching my favourite films on tv with a hot batata vadas and poha all cuddled up on sofa while its rainin outside

- Going shopping for me and my family and returning with bargains which they all love.

- Surfing on ikea.com and also doing up the house

- Making a lovely meal for my hubby on sunday morning and he relishing it by devouring it and then showing his appreciation by giving his warm smile which says it all

- Being with my aai, papa, hubby, sis, niece and catching up on all the antics of my niece and listening to her non stop affable jabber

- Going to Goa, Mangeshi temple which brings back all fantastic childhood memories

- Meeting cousins/friends and chatting up with them nineteen to the dozen and catching up on all the news and gossip.

- Reading up on inspiring stories, fiction -mystery, thriler, romance and humourous and mgmt books

- Writing.. ..i wish someday i get to write for some popular magazines /publications

- Travelling to unheard of places india/ abroad....treks, cycling, walks, back packing...

- Watching Movies... with a good message whether animation, serious, thriller, romantic, romcom, tear jerker etc

- Sleeping till late on Sat/Sun

- Driving on roads with no traffic

- contribute towards society esp. for causes related to environment and education

- And other things such as green mountains, beaches in winters, light drizzle, walking barefeet on dewy grass

- Walking alone in the greens and listening to the natures sounds

- Listening to lilting old melodies when tired to soothe frayed nerves