Health is Wealth!

Today is the last day of the Pink month and I have something to share.

A week back I had gone for my complete annual check-up like I do every year.

Like any annual health checks you would know, it started with a 12 hour fasting (and hunger pangs). Blood tests ( ouch!). Urine sample in the smallest container (precarious, if you know what I mean). Drinking water till my stomach felt like a dam about to burst. And then all this followed by sonography, eye check, dental check, ECG, Bone density test, this test, that test and many such battery of tests spread across many floors of the clinic.

Till I ran out of my battery. Phew!

Luckily, at the end of the rigmarole, I was still breathing when I heard the magic words. “Your tests are now complete, please come back tomorrow to collect your reports.”

I let out a collective sigh! Yes, collective, as all my body organs joined me in this chorus effort.

Ok, let me not be too dramatic. It wasn’t that bad at all.

But all I wanted to do was run home and have a good shower. Away from the overbearing “antiseptic” smell which had invaded my nasal passage and by now infiltrated even the linen clothes I was wearing. Yes, you guessed it, I abhor the smell while I know some who get a high on it.

Now, coming to the point.

The main reason I had gone for the check up was to do Mammography. Having a history in family, my sister and me, have been advised to go for an annual Mammography test every year. And it had been almost two years since the last one. Not a wise thing to do, I understood.

I was confident that all my blood parameters whether blood sugar, cholesterol, triglycerides, etc. would be within normal range. But what was worrying me was the result from Mammography.

Here I was the next day, back in the hospital staring at my reports.

Guess what, as expected all my blood reports, Sonography, ECG, Bone density, etc. reports were normal. Yippee, Well done Priya!

But the one I feared most was unfortunately, not very clear in its findings. The report suggested that there were cysts and I would need to do a sono-mammography to confirm whether the cysts were benign.

Hmm! Now what?

As any body would, I imagined the worst. It appeared that my doubts were about to get confirmed and slightly reeled under that thought.

Pressed the numbers, spoke to Ashish, gave him the feedback over the phone and he reassured me that all is well. He asked me to get that test done at earliest to put my doubts to rest. Felt a wee bit better.

The next step was to get this keeda out of my mind asap.

The gynecologist during my chat with her had advised that the best machines for mammography (or any radiology related issues) were available at PD Hinduja Hospital and next year if its that particular test, I should visit Hinduja Hospital only.

Well, I didn’t anticipate that I would have to visit the hospital in the same week itself. Anyway, I called their call center, took the appointment for Sono-mammography at Hinduja Hospital and it was scheduled for Friday (which was yesterday).

Well, my friends let me share the happy news that the results are normal and the radiologist confirmed that cysts were benign. All the symptoms that I imagined I had for Breast Cancer were confounded. I was happy in the realization that one year at least I did not have to worry.

And even if it happens, I know I will trounce over it like my brave mom did eleven years ago.

What I want to share is that it is important to do annual checks, to detect any illnesses in advance so as to increase your chance of beating the shit out of it.

Eleven years ago, my mom was forced to get the annual check up done by her sister (my maushi) when she was visiting India. Yes, forced.

Like anyone, my mom thought she was perfectly healthy and fine till we got the dreadful report in hand.

A lesson we have learnt in our family for life.

Not everyone is lucky to have a sister like Jyoti maushi who urges you strongly to get that health check done.

Sad news is that we need to do it ourselves.

We have to wake up and realize that. These annual checks are not just for our sake but also for the benefit for our near and dear ones. If someone is seriously unwell in family it’s the entire family which gets sucked into the vortex of stress and trauma. We all know that, so why delay and make matters worse.

Here is why I urge all my friends to go for a health check annually or give it as a gift to your parents, spouse or sister/brother. This Diwali, instead of real gold, why not give a Gold Package for an annual checkup.

As for me, I am relieved right now.

But I am still searching on Google to find out who that brilliant person was, who coined the famous but least appreciated phrase ‘Health is Wealth’.

Here I am, signing off in the pink of health!

The Value of Mentoring – While we teach, we learn!

As serendipity would have it, one day, I stumbled on an interesting quote by Sir Napoleon Hill, “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.”

Thus began my journey into the world of volunteering.

In the beginning, just like any other socially conscientious person, the first thing I aspired to do was to bring about sweeping changes. I wanted to clean up the system, I wanted to support the underprivileged kids, sensitize locals on cleanliness issues, I wanted to stop the illicit cutting of trees, create awareness for organ donation, and many such transformations, all in one go. Then I realized that these thoughts though noble, were lofty and capricious. They just remained in my head without translating into any visible action. And then I felt helpless just thinking about my inability to make any significant difference.

And then, just like that, in an instant, this quote opened my eyes to a new possibility. Instead of the ambitious unattainable changes I wanted to bring about all at the same time, I realized I needed to focus on small, yet meaningful goals, to begin with. And that became my mantra thereon. No one could have summed it up better than Sir Napoleon Hill.

I was now motivated and charged up. I actively started looking for causes close to my heart where I could lend my time, energy and skills. Among the many options that were available, there was one particular initiative that captured both, my heart and head. It tugged at my heartstrings because it was a program for mentoring underprivileged kids, and it appealed to my head because it was about dedicating time and efforts to mentoring one child at a time. It seemed not just a realistic objective but also a measurable and attainable goal. Given my work schedules, it was not going to be difficult for me to commit six hours every month, a prerequisite for that role. Also, since I work five days a week, I knew I could devote at least two hours over the weekends. It was the exact platform that I was looking to associate with, in all respects.

So I went ahead and applied. After going through a round of online application and then a detailed face to face interview, Mentor Me India (MMI) ultimately happened to me. I was now successfully enrolled into the program as a Mentor and was totally proud about it. After going through a two-day purposeful and an interactive induction program, it was time for the 40 peers and me in my class to step out and begin our new role as Mentors of MMI.

As planned, over one of the following weekend after the training, all the mentors and mentees (aged 10-12 years) were invited to assemble in the premises of a school. It was a day full of anticipation and apprehension for both the mentees and mentors, as we were to meet each other for the very first time.

We eagerly waited for the mentor-mentee names to be announced. And they finally did! Here I was, standing face to face with my mentee. My mentee, a tiny, shy girl, whose frame belied all of the ten years she was supposed to be. Samiksha. She had a faint voice that matched her slight build and a demeanor that seemed to match her name. (Samiksha means analytical)

Apparently, MMI had done a diligent exercise of matching our (mentor’s) background, skills, hobbies and flair with that of our mentees, before drawing up the list of pairs.

In our first meeting, Samiksha appeared quite anxious (exactly how I felt inside but did not show). She barely spoke up loudly even once for the one hour we spent discussing our interests, likes and dislikes. Every time she spoke, I had to ask her to repeat, for me to fathom what she was trying to say. But as the first hour drew to a close and rolled into another, the nervous girl was slowly metamorphosing into a slightly less inhibitive girl.

I credit that to the comfort level that both of us were attempting to build with each other. As a mentor though, I was playing by the rules but as a naive trusting mentee, she was just being herself; candid and sincere.

Here was the first lesson for me as a Mentor. As adults we tend to put up a facade and in a way we tend to be rehearsed but what truly wins over in relationships is spontaneity and being authentic.

By the end of our first meeting, she had not only introduced me to her family members through caricatures drawn on a sheet of paper but also had added life into them through her careless yet unique strokes. There she was beaming next to her art on full display in her little hands.

I had by fortuitous coincidence got my second mentoring lesson, that day itself. “Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction." – John Crosby

I realized that her happiness and strength lay in drawing and coloring. And it emerged, because I had just let her be and nudged her artistic side. I did not impose on her (like in normal circumstances I would) what I would have liked her to do. I had just momentarily experienced what John Crosby truly meant through that quote, all this by sheer stroke of luck and not by design.

Today, Samiksha and me have completed three months of our mentee-mentor relationship. There have been many experiences that have left me richer as a mentor through our meetings, including those with her mother, siblings and her extended family.

Interacting with them has allowed me to look within me more deeply and realize how privileged I am to have easy access to so many opportunities that are usually taken for granted. And here is Samiksha and her family, restrained in a less privileged world due to circumstances beyond their control and yet they seem so much happier and content. That’s been another important lesson for me as a mentor. I keenly look forward to our meetings as it has allowed me to get the big picture perspective.

I can say without hesitation that in the past three months, I have learnt more through my mentor role than may be my mentee would have learnt from me. The Roman philosopher, Seneca rightly said, “While we teach, we learn”.

As I explain to her English words and translate and write them down in Marathi (her mother tongue), I get stuck many a times, trying to remember how certain Marathi letters are written; All thanks to the excessive spoon- feeding by Google in our daily life. That’s when Samiksha comes to my rescue and she writes the letters down for me. Marathi is my mother tongue too but over the years I have sadly lost touch with the pen and the written words. Thus, every session has been sprinkled with many such accidental learnings and happy discoveries.

I have also deeply understood the importance of a mentor in the lives of these children. Samiksha is now gradually speaking more openly and actively. In fact, in one of our meetings, she even voiced her desire to become a police officer when she grows up. Now, that’s a brave aspiration to have for the disposition she currently has. But as a mentor, my duty is not to be prejudiced but provide her the right direction and truthfully guide the mentee towards her aspiration.

At the impressionable age they are, I believe, they can indeed be inspired to become whoever they want to be, whether a police officer, an engineer or doctor, in spite of the circumstances that may be in store for them.

I believe that as mentors, we have the responsibility of making that happen.

Every session, I have observed that she lights up when we take to drawing, coloring or reading story books. She is also gradually learning the nuances of English language that till now were restricted to just knowing the alphabets – A to Z. Though she has been a little behind her peers as regards learning English, having moved from her village to Mumbai only recently, she has all the eagerness to catch up. She seems to be a fast learner, focused and systematic. And that is what is important, willingness to learn.

Another happy coincidence has been that many a times, her siblings and cousins who are almost of the same age, join in our meetings. It’s so fulfilling to see that our sessions are having a ripple effect on the other children within the same family. They also sit along with us, wide-eyed and full of wonder, listening to the Chota Bheem and Amar Chitra Katha stories that are being read out and also join in the coloring and drawing sessions. These seem like simple pleasures for us but they truly create an enormous excitement in these kid’s evenings. While I am teaching English, they bring out their books to study along with her and they do so in rapt attention. Watching Samiksha and the children so eager to learn makes me even more motivated and inspired to do more.

In the beginning, before taking this role, I was apprehensive of how much difference was I was going to make to my mentee’s life. But now I understand that this opportunity not only provides a wider exposure to the mentee and her life but a bigger difference is what we also (the mentors) bring in to our lives.

Lastly, to all those who want to take up mentoring or volunteering but are not sure how much of a meaningful difference can they bring; I would like to conclude with a popular story about a little girl and the Starfish.

The story goes like this.

Once upon a time, there was an old man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach every morning before he began his work. Early one morning, he was walking along the shore after a big storm had passed and found the vast beach littered with starfish as far as the eye could see, stretching in both directions.

Off in the distance, the old man noticed a small girl approaching.  As the girl walked, she paused every so often, and as she grew closer, the man could see that she was occasionally bending down to pick up an object and throw it into the sea.  The girl came closer still, and the man called out, “Good morning!  May I ask what it is that you are doing?”

The young girl paused, looked up, and replied “Throwing starfish into the ocean. The tide has washed them up onto the beach, and they can’t return to the sea by themselves,” the little girl replied. “When the sun gets high, they will die, unless I throw them back into the water.”

The old man replied, “But there must be tens of thousands of starfish on this beach. I’m afraid you won’t be able to make much of a difference.”

The girl bent down, picked up yet another starfish and threw it as far as she could into the ocean. Then she turned, smiled and said, “It made a difference to that one!”

[Adapted from The Star Thrower, by Loren Eiseley (1907 – 1977)]

To sum up my new experience as a mentor, I say, go ahead and take the first step. Start small, focus on what is achievable, practical and brings you a sense of fulfillment. Even if it means making a difference to just one person, believe me, it would mean a lot to him/her. Just like the little girl who made a difference to the starfish in the story.

Pic courtesy: www.pennyparker2.com